Should you have a doula?
Ah yes, the question only you can answer. And you may be able to answer it immediately. But if you didn’t have an immediate answer, perhaps a good next step is to schedule a free meeting with a doula. You can look at this with the tried and true “pros and cons” method. In pregnancy and labor, you can think of this as “benefits and risks.”
What are the possible benefits of setting up a free meeting?
You can find out everything you need to know about having a doula during labor with no cost to you.
You can get all your questions answered and figure out what you want for your labor with no obligations attached.
You can learn free breathing and relaxation techniques, which you can use during your labor even if you don’t have a doula.
Different breathing and relaxation techniques work for different women. Even though you may have already learned some techniques in a childbirth class, it’s always a good idea to learn more in case they work better for you.
You can learn different labor positions, which you can use during your labor and birth even if you don’t have a doula.
Using a wide variety of different positions during labor can help you have an easier and quicker labor. During the pushing stage, certain positions make vaginal tearing and prolonged pushing more unlikely.
A doula can help you and your partner discuss and clarify your labor wishes.
It’s always helpful to spend quality time discussing your individual and mutual birth wishes, but it’s especially helpful when a knowledgeable doula can inspire and bring new life to your dialogue.
What are the possible risks?
If you don’t get anything out of the meeting, you wasted your time.
It’s truly impossible to get nothing out of the meeting because if you walk away thinking you got nothing out of it, then you’ve at least decided you don’t need to have that doula at your labor!
You’ll offend the doula if you go to a free meeting and decide you don’t want a doula.
DONA-trained doulas live by the phrase “A doula for every woman who wants one.” Not everyone wants a doula, and that’s okay! But since the first meeting is free, you might as well meet with a doula so you can decide if you actually don’t want one.
You’ll offend the doula if you go to a free meeting and then choose a different doula.
The most important part of selecting a doula is choosing someone who is the right fit for you and your loved one. Doulas want you to choose someone who is going to make you the most comfortable during your labor.
If you decide to have a doula during your labor, she’ll end up replacing your husband.
One of our jobs as doulas is to bring you and your husband closer together. When you find the right doula, she will be able to give your husband the tools he needs to help you in the best possible way, NOT replace him.
Here is where the “benefits and risks” approach gets complicated. You could get technical and point out that there are a lot of possible risks to setting up a free meeting. But in reality, these risks just aren’t very likely to happen, so there’s nothing holding you back from setting up a free meeting!
Is money a problem? Money shouldn’t hold any woman back from having a doula if she wants one. Some doulas are able to offer discounts for their services or give you a package option that costs less. You won’t know unless you ask!
